Sunday Song Devotions - May 30, 2010

Sing to the King
"Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation. Let us come before Him with thanksgiving and extol Him with music and song." Psalm 95:1-2

Author: Billy Foote

The following is from PraiseGathering.com:
Sing to the King - Randy Vader
(Friday, March 24, 2006)

“I love to sing. I love to hear singing. I love the idea of using music for the purpose it was created… to bring praise to God. I love everything about the music of the church except the music of the church I don’t like. Music I don’t like distracts me. Music I don’t like makes me angry. Music I don’t like frustrates my ability to worship.”

How many times have we heard comments like these? When I am confronted by dear saints who struggle with this, I always start the conversation with . . . I don’t want to talk about what you like. I want to talk about what you don’t like. And when they vent all of their feelings about the awful state of music in the church- I ask the big question. What is the big question? “Are you prepared to believe that God can use something for His glory that you can’t stand?!”

I certainly have my preferences – but as a song writer and publisher and minister - I try to not let my personal preferences get confused with my Theological absolutes. Because something does not speak to me culturally or does not fall into the realm of my own taste does not mean that it isn’t speaking to someone else.

Psalm 40 tells us that God gave us a song – a song of praise – but He did not tell us what it sounded like… in fact, He did not say that many will hear the song and their lives will be changed… He said that many will SEE and their lives will be changed. I hope those who are trying to praise the Lord don’t see some saints with arms folded and angry looks on their faces or worse yet – getting up and walking out! And lest you think I am above the argument, I am sorry to confess that I have been guilty of all of these. My prayer is that we would spend more time focusing on who we have come to worship rather than how we are going about it. That is where the Scriptures put the emphasis… that should tell us something.

Psalm 40 (A David psalm)
"I waited and waited and waited for God. At last He looked; finally He listened. He lifted me out of the ditch, pulled me from deep mud. He stood me up on a solid rock to make sure I wouldn't slip. He taught me how to sing the latest God-song, a praise-song to our God. More and more people are seeing this: they enter the mystery, abandoning themselves to God."

Psalm 95:1-7
"Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation. Let us come before Him with thanksgiving and extol Him with music and song. For the Lord is the great God, the great King above all gods. In His hand are the depths of the earth, and the mountain peaks belong to Him. The sea is His, for He made it, and His hands formed the dry land. Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker; for He is our God and we are the people of His pasture, the flock under His care."

How Great Thou Art
"O LORD our LORD, how excellent is Thy Name in all the earth!  who has set Thy glory above the heavens." - Psalm 8:1

Author: English words written by Stuart K. Hine around 1933. (inspired by the original which was written in swedish by Swedish pastor, Carl Boberg in 1886)

The original song was actually a poem written by Pastor Carl Boberg in 1886 and was entitled, "O Store Gud".  His inspiration for this text was said to have come from a visit to a beautiful country estate on the southeast coast of Sweden.  He was suddenly caught in a midday thunderstorm with awe-inspiring moments of flashing violence, followed by a clear brilliant sun.  Soon afterwards he heard the calm, sweet songs of the birds in nearby trees.  The experience prompted the pastor to fall to his knees in humble adoration of His mighty God.  He penned his exaltation in a nine-stanza poem beginning with the Swedish words, "O Store Gud, nar jad den varld besgader."  Several years later Boberg was attending a meeting in the Province of Varmland and was surprised to hear the congregation sing his poem to the tune of an old Swedish melody.

Not long after it was written, it was then translated into German by Manfred von Glehn and entitled, "Wie gross bist Du."  Later in 1925, the Reverend E Gustav Johnson of North Park College in Chicago, IL made the first literal English translation fromt he Swedish test.  This translation is quite different from the test that we know today but can still be found in some hymnals.  Johnson's literal translation of the Swedish test is entitled, "O Mighty God, When I Behold the Wonder."
In 1927, I. S. Prokhanoff came upon the German version and translated it into the Russian language.
In 1933, the Reverend S. K. Hine and his wife, English missionaried, were ministering the the people of the Ukraine.  It was there that they learned the Russian translation of "O Store Gud" from a congregation of Ukrainians.

Later, while they were crossing into Sub-Carpathian Russia, where the mountain scenery was so beautiful, they began to write original English lyrics to the song inspired by unforgettable experiences in the Carpathian mountains.  This is where they wrote the first three verses that we sing today.  The fourth was written later upon their return to England. (Source: 101 Hymn Stories by Kenneth W. Osbeck) 

Note from Kim:
I think what is most intriguing about this song is the fact that it is not even nearly the original version that is sung today.  It was inspired by a version of an interpretation of the original.  Yet we consider it sacred.  I personally believe it is lyrically one of the most beautiful of the hymns currently in our hymnbooks, and I'm sure most would agree.  However, like many of the hymns that we consider to be so sacred it is not the original.  So many would argue that it is inappropriate to change, alter or update the hymns.  However, many of them are updates or alterations in and of themselves.  Interesting. 

I think it's a wonderful reminder that the originality of the text is not what makes it sacred, but rather the truth of it.  The reason that Mr. Hine re-wrote this song with English lyrics is so that more people would be able to hear, sing and understand the song that had meant so much to him and his wife.  We need to be willing and ready to do the same when needed in order that those of the 21st century will be able to understand and sing the songs that we have loved for so long. 

What a beautiful reminder that these songs are just simply an opportunity for us to learn something about the character of God and to worship Him for that revelation.  We must remember not to worship the song itself, but the One to which the song was written.
 
How Great Is Our God
"How great is God - beyond our understanding!" Job 36:26
 
Author: Chris Tomlin
 
The following is from Crosswalk.com
in an article entitled, "What are we Singing: How Great is Our God"
written by Eva Marie Everson
 
"Singer/Songwriter Chris Tomlin’s song How Great is Our God has inspired this generation of believers by reminding us that God is no ordinary being sitting on a common throne dressed in rags. God’s very being, according to the Word, expresses magnificence our words strain to capture.
 
Isaiah wrote: In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: with two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another: Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory. At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.
 
This paints a powerful picture of who God is and how His Spirit reveals Himself to those who are “ready” to see how wonderful—which is surely a weak word for describing the Almighty—God truly is.
 
From the beginning of time, God has urged us to glimpse into his greatness. In Genesis 28, the patriarch Jacob—who was not quite a father himself but a son on the run—lays down to sleep while traveling from Beersheba to Haran, his mother’s hometown. While sleeping, Jacob dreamed of a stairway stretching from earth to heaven. The angels of God ascended and descended on the ladder, but at the top stood the Lord, who spoke to Jacob, making a lasting covenant with him and his descendents.
 
The prophets’ writings (such as those found in Ezekiel and Isaiah) are filled to overflowing with visions and elements of God’s majesty and sovereignty. The New Testament story begins with God’s display of greatness. Glory to God in the highest, the angels sang above the shepherds' field. And on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.  Jesus' ministry was filled with miracles, His death resulted in the darkening of the sky, an earthquake, the tearing of the veil in the temple, and the opening of graves; the occupants of those graves filled again with life. Three days later He returned from the grave Himself, fully alive.  Forty days after that, He ascended before witnesses just outside of Jerusalem.
 
This same Jesus revealed Himself to John, His beloved disciple, approximately 40 years later in what has become known as John's Revelation. John's description of the Christ is much like those of Ezekiel and Isaiah in detail.
 
His feet were like bronze glowing in a furnace, and his voice was like the sound of rushing waters…When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead. Then he placed his right hand on me and said: “Do not be afraid. I am the First and the Last. I am the Living One; I was dead and behold I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades.”
 
God displayed his power and will to Paul on the road to Damascus and, at some point, took the apostle (or so theologians believe it was Paul) to “the third heaven.”  Is it any wonder then that Paul wrote:
 
Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How Unsearchable his judgments and his paths beyond tracing out. Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor? Who has ever given to God that God should repay him? For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory forever!
 
How Great is Our God!
 
And is it any wonder then that Chris Tomlin penned his words in tribute to the greatness of God? Or that even with the sheer beauty and imagery of the lyrics and the Scriptures, we cannot come close to knowing… to understanding… to reaching the full definition of His greatness.
 
Perhaps none of us, really, are ready to know just how wonderful God truly is."

Real Worship

http://johnmarkmcmillan.blogspot.com/2010/02/wear-your-heart-on-your-sleeve.html

I love John Mark McMillan.  Mostly because he's so honest and real in his songs.  I love that.  I think it's something that's altogether missing from worship music.  If you're a songwriter, worship leader, singer, worshipper - please read the above post.  I think it's important that you do.

- Kim

My little lost sheep

Last night as we were getting ready to go to church for rehearsal, at some point Maya went missing.  I thought she was in the play room with the other two girls and I slipped away to go brush my teeth and hair while Ricky loaded the carseats in the car.  I came back a few minutes later to get them cleaned up and dressed.  I called for Maya but she didn't come.  So I started searching (not worried, just in a bit of a hurry).  Couldn't find her anywhere.  I called to Ricky to help me find her - still thinking that she must be hiding behind a chair or table somewhere.  My house isn't that big so when I didn't find her in about five minutes I started to panic.  I called to Syd and Elisa to help us look.  We looked in bathtubs, closets, cabimets, in laundry baskets, in the back yard and the front yard all while calling out her name.  After about ten or fifteen minutes of searching high and low I called 911. 
He started asking me questions about how much she weighed or how tall she was, her date of birth, what she was wearing - most of which I couldn't remember because of the state of mind that I was in.
About a hundred scenarios rushed through my mind as I was running up and down my street calling her little name terrified that she wouldn't be found.
As the police were less than a minute away (I heard sirens), Elisa came out the front door yelling that they found her!  At first I didn't believe it - I said "What do you mean you found her?" confused at how she could just suddenly show back up.  Apparently she was hiding in the very back of my closet behind the low hanging clothes.  What's crazy is that I looked in that closet twice - and even looked behind that rack of clothes!  I called to her when I was looking in there and she didn't answer.  I still am very curious about what was going through her little mind as she hid for 30 minutes without a peep while we were frantically calling for her to come out.
I can't even put to words how I felt when I thought she was lost - and how I felt after she had been found.

I wonder if that's how God feels about us.  I wonder if He feels that same kind of pain when we're trying to hide from Him and refusing to be found.  I know that He knows where we are and so doesn't experience fear.  I wonder, though, if the pain He feels for His lost sheep is anything like the pain I felt last night about my little lost sheep.  I wonder if, when His lost sheep return if He feels anything like I did last night when mine showed back up.

I think the part of all of it that still amazes me is that when we found Maya she had no idea anything was happening.  I couldn't control my sobbing when I was finally holding her again - and she just kept looking at me trying to figure out what in the heck was wrong with her crazy mommy.  She had no idea that she was the one that caused the pain.

I have a feeling that there's a lesson there for us.  I'm still a little too weary and shaken up to explore it fully.  But I know this.  If God loves me more than I love Maya (and I know He does b/c He's the source of the love in the first place), then I know He must feel so much more deeply than I ever could for His lost sheep.  It makes me want to pray so much harder for those lost sheep who mean everything to Him.  It makes me want to look at people differently when I know how deeply the Father cares for them.

Last night was the hardest night of my life so far (and I've had really hard ones!).  I pray that God will use what I've learned for His glory.

Wait, Wait, Wait your turn...

I had a bit of a revelation today during Bible study class.  We were talking about waiting on God and how hard it is to trust in His timing. 

Ever since my oldest daughter was little, I wanted her to be good at waiting.  I think it's hugely important for us to teach our kids that waiting is important and that they can't always have what they want immediately when they want it.  It's so annoying to see a child chanting over and over again what they want and how they want it NOW!  I really, really didn't want my child to be like that.  So, when Elisa was about 2 or so, I taught her a 'waiting' song to make it more fun while she had to wait for something - her turn when playing with friends, for her food to be ready to eat - you get the idea.  The song went like this (to the tune of Row, Row, Row Your Boat)...

Wait, wait, wait your turn - waiting can be fun.
Patience, Patience, Patience everyone.

We sang it over and over and over again.  We would sing it on long car rides when she wanted to be home already, or when she wanted so badly to go play at the park but I had some chores to do first.  It was actually really effective with her.  She had fun with the song.  I think it helped me to teach her that waiting can be fun and how to deal with things that aren't happening as quickly as she would like.  Even now when she has trouble with waiting, I remind her of the song and she'll sing it by herself (sidenote: I have the best kid ever :)

I wonder if I need my own grown up version of the 'waiting' song. 

I have such a hard time waiting on God's timing in just about every area of my life.  I wonder if sometimes He is using my circumstances to teach me about the importance of learning to wait on Him.  I wonder if I will ever learn the lesson.  You would think that each time would get a little easier, or that I would at least be a little less impatient than the last time.  Sadly, I'm not sure that's the case.  I hope that today I've made progress - and that tomorrow I'll be more patient.

I can almost hear Him inviting me to sing along with Him -
"Wait, wait, wait your turn...waiting can be fun. 
Patience, patience, patience everyone."

View from the Fishbowl

I was driving home from my parents house yesterday.  I came to where a small road intersects with a much bigger one.  I was sitting at the light (first one in line) waiting to turn left on the bigger road.  There was a man behind me in a big pickup truck.  He obviously wanted to turn right and was quite annoyed that I was in his way (he could have turned right on red).  He kept turning on and off his blinker and edging a tiny bit closer to my bumper every few seconds to make sure I knew that I was in his way.  I honestly thought it was a little funny, but was also a bit annoyed at his lack of patience and kindness.

Tonight as I was laying in bed trying desperately to sleep, God brought back to mind that encounter.  I began to wonder how often I behave that way.  How often do I wish that those around me would either go my way or just get out of my way altogether?  I'm not talking about driving.  I'm talking about life.  About ministry.  About relationships.  I often get annoyed or impatient with people not doing things the way that makes the most sense to me.  Sometimes even at God.  I often wish that God would do things in a way that makes sense to me.  I often find myself wondering, "Now why'd you do it that way, God?" 

The man in that truck knew nothing about me, my route, my life...but he was annoyed that I was making things harder for him.  It was all about him.  So often we get stuck in the 'but what about me' mindset and forget that "God is painting on a canvas bigger than we can see or comprehend".  Our little piece of the puzzle is just that - a little piece.  When I begin to think I deserve, desire, wish, want or need anything apart from what God says I need - I miss the bigger picture.  I'm seeing things from inside the fishbowl. 

Often God won't let me go to sleep until He's told me what He needed to tell me - until my will is surrendered to His - until my heart is about obedience and the things of God.  Tonight is a night like that. 

My prayer for tonight is that God will help me to step outside of myself, my problems, my hurt, my confusion and try to see things from an eternal perspective instead of from my tiny little fishbowl. 

The Things Kids say...

My conversation with my 3 yr old earlier today:

Sydney: Mommy, do you like me?

Me: Of course I like you!  Why?

Sydney: Because I don't like you.

The Lord is my Maestro

In my Thursday morning bible study, we are studying the Psalms.  Several weeks ago, while studying Psalm 23, we were challenged to create our own psalm.  It took me several weeks, but I finally did.  I know it's a little cheesy and I am a rhyme-er, so it mostly all rhymes.  But - here it is nonetheless:

     The LORD is my Maestro, I will sing for Him alone.

     He fills me with joy and excitement as He lets me play my part,
     He rejoices over me with singing, and puts His music in my heart.

     He stirs my soul and pulls out the innermost parts of me,
     So that I can play a part in His majestic symphony!

     Even when life is hard and I'm stuck in a minor key,
     I know He'll lead me through it with His perfect melody.

     And when no one cares or understands the songs I choose to sing,
     He lovingly reminds me that I'm singing only for my King!

     As God allows, my lifesong will proclaim His Holy Name,
     And then He'll fly me up to Heaven where I'll worship with the saints!

@ Dunn Bros this Saturday night...

What we are worshipping we are becoming...

"A person will worship something, have no doubt about that. We may think our tribute is paid in secret in the dark recesses of our hearts, but it will out. That which dominates our imaginations and our thoughts will determine our lives, and our character. Therefore, it behooves us to be careful what we worship, for what we are worshipping we are becoming."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

I read this quote earlier today and was moved by it. Emerson was a pastor in a Christian church early in his life. He then lost his wife and began to pull away from the church. Eventually he spearheaded the Transcendental movement in the 19th century. I wonder at what point in his life he wrote this.

I read this quote and am both inspired and convicted.
I have read through it several times and I completely agree with Ralph on this topic. He's right.

We all worship something.

What we worship determines who we are.

I especially love the last line...what we are worshipping we are becoming.


I pray that is true of me.
I believe that is the true goal of God-worship:
To become more like Christ.

If we are not becoming more like Christ ...
we probably should be asking the question ...

what are we really worshiping?

How He Loves

The song, How He Loves, by John Mark McMillan has had an enormous impact on me these last few months. We've sung it at the Edge a few times and I've been told that it has affected many of the students as well. I absolutely love this song. For a million reasons. I love that it is grounded in biblical truth. I love that it is real and raw. I love that it came out of real life experience and real emotion. But mostly I love that the author wasn't afraid to be real in the lyrics. He wrote exactly what he felt like he needed to say. I love that.
When I write songs, most of them come directly from my journal. Many of them are what I was saying to God, or what God was saying to me. They are usually very personal. This song is so very personal. Not just to John Mark, but to me, and to so many people all over the world.
I think that the Gospel message can really be summed up in the words to the chorus of this song:

He loves us, Oh how He loves us, Oh how He loves us, Oh how He loves!!

I also really love the (controversial) lyrics in the 2nd verse:

Heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way...(He loves us!)

I honestly hate that there are so many churches that feel that they need to change the lyrics of the song in order to make it more 'comfortable' for the congregations. I hate that we feel that we have to make the Gospel more 'comfortable' for people. I believe that Christ's birth, death and resurrection were anything but comfortable. I very much believe that they were very messy and uncomfortable (you might even say kind of like a 'sloppy wet kiss'). I wish that we spent less time worrying about offending people with the message of Christ and more time worrying about people dying without Him!

In regards to the controversial lyrics, John Mark had this to say:

"The idea behind the lyric is that the kingdom of heaven and the kingdom of
earth converge in a way that is both beautiful and awkwardly messy. Think
about the birth of a child, or even the death of Jesus himself. These miracles are both incredibly beautiful and incredibly sloppy ("gory" may be more realistic, but “Heaven meets earth like a gory mess” didn’t seem to have the same ring). Why does the church have such a problem with things being sloppy? Do we really think we’re fooling anyone on Sunday morning, especially God? Are we going to offend him? I mean, he’s seen us naked in the shower all week and knows our worst thoughts, and still thinks we’re awesome. What if we took all the energy we spent faking and used that energy to enjoy the Lord instead? That could be revolutionary!"

If you haven't heard the song yet, check it out here.

One more...

I'm really getting a lot done today...

Love this...

Very cool...

Hypocritical Worship

"I hate all your show and pretense - the hypocrisy of your religious festivals and solemn assemblies...Away from me with your hymns of praise! They are only noise to my ears. I will not listen to your music, no matter how lovely it is. Instead, I want to see a mighty flood of justice, a river of righteous living that will never run dry."

Amos 5:21, 23-24

God was talking here to the Israelites who were, according to God, extremely unjust and wicked. They were lying, cheating, oppressing the poor. He called them hypocrites because they talked about worship and sacrifice, but they ignored the injustices happening among them. In these verses it is obvious that these injustices and the lack of righteous living were absolutely essential to worship. They could not worship God on Sunday (or Saturday actually, right?) and act like everyone else the rest of the week.
When our life outside the church walls doesn't match our life inside the church walls - When we say we love Jesus, but can't love our co-worker or neighbor - When we promise to follow His ways, but ignore the hurting or needy all around us - our worship becomes hollow. It becomes useless to God. Worship is, after all, more than music - it's about obedience. I have heard worship defined as "our response to who God is and what God has done."

I do think it's interesting that in these verses he specifically talks about music. Have you ever been singing a song on Sunday morning about the amazing grace of Jesus Christ when you realized that you are still angry at your spouse for something that happened earlier that day or even that week?? I have. Have you ever sat in the middle of the worship service and been annoyed or even angry about the odd outbursts of someone who may be new to church and God and who is quite different than the people you normally see come through your church doors? Guilty.

God doesn't care at all for offerings of worship that aren't backed up by our lifestyle. He isn't interested in hollow worship. He isn't pleased by singing hypocrites - no matter how beautiful we think we sound.

If we seek to worship God, we must also seek His justice. If we seek to worship God, we must also share His grace. If we seek to truly worship God, we must stand up for what is right (no matter what people think of us).

I'm reminded of a song I've loved for a long time called Stand by Susan Ashton. Here is my favorite part...

In a moment of truth at the top of the will
I open my arms and let go of my will
And stand with my face to the wind
With the storm beating down
On this sacred ground
If I stand, for the graceI have known
For what I believe
Then I won't stand alone - no I won't stand alone.

When you were 16...

...where did you think you would be when you were 30?

Me? I'm not sure - but probably thought I'd be a professional singer, living on the road and seeing the world. I always wanted to travel everywhere.

Kind of funny because I have honestly never been anywhere!

What about you???

Maya Turns One!

I know this video is late, but better late than never.

Toothpaste or Strawberries?

Okay, so this morning I was sitting on the couch drinking my tea and watching Rachel Ray (for the first time in forever!) while keeping an eye on the kids. Well, Maya walks up to me with a tube of toothpaste in her hands smiling ear to ear. Not wanting her to get it all over herself (or my floor), I took it away and set it on the table next to me just out of her reach. She completely lost it! She is just learning to throw fits, and this one was a doozy. She threw herself onto the floor and cried and cried. Everytime I tried to give her something to distract her, she'd push it away and cry harder. I couldn't help but laugh. (I know, I'm a wonderful mother :)
I just kept thinking...toothpaste? really? That's what you want? I even tried offering her some strawberries (her favorite) and she wouldn't have it. It was toothpaste or bust!

I started thinking about all the times I've done that to God. How many times have I cried over the "toothpaste" that I couldn't live without when God had juicy, red, wonderful strawberries He wanted to give me if I'd just stop crying over the lost toothpaste!

I wonder if God laughs at me the way I did Maya. Probably so.

What about you? Are you crying over toothpaste, or waiting for the strawberries?

Screamo worship?

It's been a really long time since I blogged. My computer is still in the shop - with no return date set yet :(
In the meantime, check out this post by my friend, the goofy college dude. I hope you will appreciate his words as much as I did!

Not Good Enough...part 2

I’ve been thinking lately. If God’s going to do what God’s going to do regardless of what we do … does it matter what we do at all? Is our effort, planning, hard work, talent, skill, etc important at all in the scheme of God’s plan? It must be – or He wouldn’t give us the skills, abilities, knowledge to do those things.
I know that God doesn’t need us to accomplish His will – BUT He chooses to use us. In light of that…
I believe we should offer our everything. The very best we have to give. I can't imagine anyone would disagree with that, but how often do we really live that way?
Like the story in John 12 about the anointing at Bethany. When Mary came with her very best perfume, in a very large bottle and poured it all out on Jesus feet – she was giving him everything she had. Holding nothing back. She didn’t bring whatever was closest to the door (most convenient), the one that was easiest to find or carry, she didn’t pick something off the street to bring to Jesus. She picked the very best, most expensive, most treasured thing she had to offer to her King. She wasn't concerned with convenience, ease or cost.
She knew it would cost her. I wonder what she was giving up in order to bring that offering to Jesus. I’m guessing it was just as much a sacrifice as an offering. I’m guessing that it probably cost her a meal or two or ten – and it meant that she would be questioned, ridiculed, criticized . I wonder if she was afraid what people would think? I wonder if she was wondering how she would take care of her bills/food/family? I am wondering if she thought about anything else at all – other than the incredible privilege of bringing her very best to the One and Only?

I am reminded of a specific time in my life when I abandoned all in worship of that same One and Only. There was a mission trip I was a part of as a teenager – called Houston 2000. I honestly don’t remember what we did there. I don’t remember what the purpose of the trip was (sad, huh?). I only remember that it is there that Jesus met me where I was and taught me how to worship. Not just in song, but in lifestyle. Not just through music, but through thoughts and intentions and obedience. It was in that place that I understood for the first time what it felt like to abandon everything for the sake of getting just a little closer to the Savior. Usually when we pray or worship we bow our heads or get lower to the ground as a picture of reverence and devotion. That’s a wonderful thing. But that time God brought me to a place where I was standing on my tip-toes reaching up as high as I could desperate to be closer to him. My eyes were wide open and I was looking up to that ugly ceiling and sobbing and singing with everything in me that Jesus was my everything. Oh to go back to that place.

I have experienced many similar moments over these last 10 years – but none like that one. It was my first. Firsts are special. The first time I met Jesus was special – I will never meet Him like that again. The first time I held each of my daughters were special – I will never feel like that again with any of them. The first time I held my husband’s hand and looked into his eyes was special. Even though I love him more now than I ever thought possible – it will never feel like it did that first time.

That moment in Houston, TX I met Jesus in a way that I never have since. It was the moment that I understood that He wants my everything. Not just some of me – but all of me. Not just my best – but my VERY best. Not just 1 day a week, but 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Anything less than that is not good enough. My last post was all about how I feel like I’m in a perpetual state of not-good-enough. I hope that won’t always be the case. I struggle EVERY day – EVERY moment – with trying to remember to give God my everything. My thoughts. My works. My family. My job. My relationships. My obedience. My words. My intentions. My feelings. I know He wants it all. I wonder if in our busy schedules, many responsibilities, and all the things we do FOR God we are missing the simple act of sitting at His feet giving Him everything we have heart and soul?

God deserves my best, expects my best and even demands my very best. Anything short of that is not good enough. I pray that today I will make every effort to serve him instead of others, to love him instead of myself, to focus on him instead of all the ‘things’ I need to get done. And I pray that I will learn to rely on His strength and instruction in order to do all of those things. I pray that my life today will be an act of worship of my One and Only. Anything less than that is simply not good enough.

Not Good Enough

I feel like I'm in a perpetual state of not good enough. How about you? It really gets me down a lot of the time. I feel like no matter how hard I work, or how much I prepare, or how badly I want to give my everything - there is always something that holds me back or drags me down. I feel like the more I know God, the more I know about Him - the more 'not good enough' I feel.
I don't think that it's such a bad thing to always want to give more, do more, be more for Christ. I actually think it's a good thing for me to feel that way about myself.
BUT...here's where it becomes a not-so-good thing. My incredibly high standards that I set for myself (and never feel like I come close to achieving) are starting to color my opinions of others around me. I often expect everyone around me to aim for those impossible standards too, and when they don't I get really frustrated. I KNOW it's my own issue - and that I should only worry about myself, but have been really struggling with it lately.

In John 21, Jesus is asking Peter if he loves Him and Peter keeps saying yes - and Jesus keeps saying, then feed my sheep..then this happened...

20Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, "Lord, who is going to betray you?") 21When Peter saw him, he asked, "Lord, what about him?"
22Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me."

It's interesting that in the middle of the lesson that Jesus was trying to teach Peter - about how to love Him - he gets distracted by someone else around him and wants to know what Jesus wanted to do with him. Jesus says basically that it's none of his business - and that all that should matter to Peter is what Peter will do. I have been focusing a lot on this passage lately and have been making huge efforts to focus on my service, my job, my responsibilities as a follower of Christ and not worrying about everyone else's responsibilities. It's a battle I struggle with almost daily - and I intend to win.

Jesus says to me today...'as for you, Kim...you must follow me."

Funny Kid Stories

Okay, so I've always thought my kids were entertaining. But sometimes they are downright hilarious! Here are a few recent examples..

Wisdom from an 8 year old (all of this happened during the car ride home from school):

First...
E: "I think it must take a long time for food to go from our mouth all the way back out."
Mom: "Actually, baby it has to go through a lot of organs before it's ready to come back out - like your stomach and your intestines."
E: "Hey - dogs have intestines too! I learned that from Martha Speaks." Then, in her best know-it-all voice..."See mom, Martha Speaks is educational. That's why I should always get to watch it. And Cyberchase too cause it teaches fractions."

Then...
E: "I wonder if anyone knows how to stop the water from coming out when they need to go to the restroom. I think the scientists should really figure that one out."

And my very favorite...
As we were driving into our neighborhood there was a kid with his parents all out in the middle (the actual middle) of the street! They didn't even look up or move when we (in my huge van) finally had to just drive around them! Then my 8-yr old said..
E: "I wonder if they are hobos. (pause) One of my friends in Sunday School said that hobos are d-u-m-b (she spells it cause she thinks it's a major bad word) cause they go into the street and just lay down until cars run over them. But I think they just sit next to the street and ask for food and money and clothes and stuff cause they are actually homeless."

Wisdom from a 2-year-old:

First...
The other day Syd was lifting up and down her shirt because she thought it was funny. Then suddenly she stopped and said...
S: "Mommy, mommy look! (then she pointed at her chest) - I have bra!"

And last night...
After tooting on me and laughing she suddenly had a very concerned look on her face and said...
S: "Mommy? Yesterday I toot on Christian's mommy."
Mom: "What, baby?"
S: Yesterday I toot on Aunt Chelle."

Don't really have any wisdom from the 1-year-old yet, but give her 6 months or so and I'm sure she'll be just as genius as the other two.

Man, I love my kids!

Simply Love, Africa

Some amazing friends of mine, Brenda and Gary Gorman, are starting the process to adopt from Ethiopia. This will be their second adoption. Their first brought them beautiful Eliana.

This is Eliana at her adoption celebration in July 2007.

This is a much more recent pic that I stole from their blog.

In an effort to raise money for the upcoming adoption, they are selling the coolest t-shirts ever!

Here are a couple of pics of some of them. They are $25 each and the proceeds go directly to the adoption fund for the newest little Gorman.

You can check out the shirts on their adoption blog at http://simplyloveafrica.blogspot.com/

where you can also read their adoption story.

If you have an extra $25 to spend - I hope that you'll consider supporting this amazing family in their adoption. I can't wait to get my shirt :)

The Breakfast Song

Might be the worst thing I've EVER heard! Yikes! So many questions...



Did you notice all the Elvis stuff in the background? Poor Elvis.

Makes me want to put down the guitar...

AMAZING!!



You should check out his Mario Bros & all the other video game theme songs.

seriously - amazing!

Starfield ROCKS ... even on handbells :)

You HAVE to watch this video. Pretty impressive considering it was all on bells of some sort.





And here's Starfield's version: