It's been a hard week. We've had some major financial issues come up that we're still not quite sure how to handle. We've been struggling with what we're supposed to do & whether or not we really do trust God. We can say all day that we trust Him, but it's times like these where we have to put our money where our mouth is - literally. In church last night - we read through 2 Corinthians 4 and 5. Chapter 4 is the treasure in jars of clay passage - we are pressed but not crushed, persecuted not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed. I was feeling all of those things yesterday. Like everything that could go wrong was going wrong.
But, verse 15 of chapter 5, though says this: "Christ died for all so that those who live would not continue to live for themselves. He died for them and was raised from the dead so that they would live for Him." Our pastor said that because of what Christ did for me, His love requires something from me. Instead of living for myself (and my needs, wants, etc) I live for Christ. Everything that happens in my life is an opportunity for me to live for Him. He can use this nasty, scary financial situation as a way to show me and those around me who He is - and just how big He is. I don't know what He will do with this situation we are in - but I know I have to trust Him to do whatever that is - and that it is for good (not necessarily my idea of good - but kingdom good). I know that if I will allow it - He will amaze me again. I pray that He gives me the strength today to be obedient to Him. To trust Him. To believe Him.
I am reminded of an old hymn -
Jesus, Jesus, how I trust him
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er
Jesus, Jesus precious Jesus
Oh for grace to trust Him more
That is my prayer today.